People See You The Way They Are Not The Way You Are
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Did you know people see you the way they are not the way you are? It’s true. I was listening to a podcast the other day and this was mentioned by the speaker (sorry I listen to so many I can’t recall who the speaker was). At first, I was thinking she has it all wrong it’s the other way around. But then I thought about it and it works both ways. People see you the way they are not they way you are and we too see people the same way.
The more I thought about it the more it made sense. I even realized that it isn’t just other people who see us the way they are but we too see people the way we are. I think this is why we expect so much from others or so little. Let me explain in more detail.
Is there someone who shoots down your dreams and goals? Maybe they laugh at you when you talk about the things you want and how you plan to get them. Or they just tune you out when you talk about the things you’re passionate about. Has this ever happened to you? Possibly from a close friend or even family member.
The truth is these types of people don’t believe they can reach their own dreams or let alone set goals.They just sort of accept what life gives them. So when you talk about your dreams and how you plan to make them a reality, it is natural for them to automatically tune you out.
I honestly don’t think it is a jealousy thing; which is something I thought for years, to be honest. I just assumed family members were jealous because I was a “go-getter” if I wanted something bad enough I went after it. The truth is they see me as they see their-self. If they don’t set goals or dream big then how can they give me support and believe in me? They can’t because they don’t really know how to.
Someone very close to me, someone I love very much, said some really nasty things to me just a couple weeks ago. This person called me selfish, told me I do nothing but use my mom as a babysitter, even went as far as bringing my faith into it.
I, of course, know the truth and did not allow these things to bring me down. However, I couldn’t help but wonder what sparked such hatred. All over a post I wrote about my opinion on the minimum wage raise. In that post, my goal was to show people where I came from and where I am now and how it is a choice.
Sadly some took it as I was looking down on others which I assure you I was not and still do not look down on others. In-fact my purpose is to use my knowledge and creativity to inspire others to follow their God-Given Dream through my Blog and courses. I have been with out lights, food, a car, you name it I have been there. But I wouldn’t be where I am today if I never experienced those things.
So, after I thought about it I came to realize people see us the way they are not the way we are. Just like the person who was very close to me who said those nasty things was really reflecting those things from their-self. I also realized in that same moment I am not innocent.
That following week someone else very close to me said something to me as well. They said that I make them feel like they are less than. I didn’t really understand how I made them feel less than. I never brag about things I have which really isn’t much, to be honest. I don’t think I am better than anyone especially since I will always remember where I came from.
This just boggled my mind. Again it was over the minimum wage dispute. All I was saying was if I could do it so could anyone else. I didn’t understand what the problem was. Then it came to me after I listened to that one podcast “people see you as they are not as you are“, I was seeing everyone as I am not as they are.
Yep, I am not innocent and you probably aren’t either. Just because I bettered myself and it is my purpose to inspire and help others through my blog and courses I sometimes expect everyone to just jump in full-force and believe in their-self like I do. I expect them to set goals they only dream of achieving and do anything to reach it.
Of course, the reality is it takes a lot to change your mindset. I know I changed mine. The thing is I sometimes forget all the thoughts I had to chase away and the actions I had to force myself to take even when I didn’t want to. I forget it wasn’t always easy.
Instead of being an example I tend to push my thoughts, feelings, and opinions on others in a way that can sometimes be intimidating. I don’t do it on purpose I do it with a mindset “if I can do it so can you.” I will now take a step back and see everyone for who they are and not who I am. I will do my best to inspire and encourage them in a less intimidating way.
I had heard on another podcast that if you just do you, meaning you do what you are best at, people will begin to take notice. So, for now, on instead of seeing others as I am and expecting them to automatically understand me I will see them for who they are. As you go about your day do your best to remember people see you the way they are not the way you are.